Approachability Principle

Being at ease with ourselves helps others be at ease with us. People miss many opportunities for connection and the chance to build deeper relationships because they do not make themselves approachable. Approachable people usually exhibit the following seven characteristics:

1. Personal warmth. Approachable people truly like people. To be approachable, you need to generate personal warmth toward the people you meet.

2. Appreciation for the differences in people. Approachable people appreciate people for who they are and what they have to offer.

3. Consistency of mood. Approachable people are evenkeeled and predictable. You know what you’ll get because they are basically the same every time you see them.

4. Sensitivity toward people’s feelings. Although approachable people are emotionally steady, they might not expect others to be that way. They tune in to the moods and feelings of others, and then adjust how they relate to them.

5. Understanding of human weaknesses and exposure of their own. Approachable people are honest about their abilities and shortcomings. They are willing to be told not what they want to hear but what they need to hear.

6. Ability to forgive easily and quickly ask for for-giveness. Approachable people quickly ask for forgiveness and easily grant it to others.
7. Authenticity. Approachable people are real. They engage with others on a genuine level, and don’t pretend to be someone they’re not. They don’t go out of their way to hide what they think and feel. They have no hidden agenda.

Soundview Executive Book Summaries John C. Maxwell "Winning with People"